Today was a weird day. Nothing bad happened, but I just had weird feelings around everything that I am working toward. My lease has officially started at my new kitchen space, but the space is far from ready to be used for cooking. My appliances are being hooked up on Monday and I have to wait for the health inspector to come and sign off on everything. I ended up buying a few appliances and prep tables from the bakery that occupied this space before me, so that is good, but now, my time is being spent trying to clean all the crust and grease off the used pieces, so that they will be nice and clean when I start using them. My day today was spent working on cleaning these appliances.
All by myself in this large kitchen space. It is slow moving and lonely.
The future is everything I wanted, but it is not there yet and am not sure it will ever be exactly what I envisioned. But I trust the universe that it will be beautiful, because I know that I will make it so, but right now, I feel like I have a long way to go and am navigating this journey alone. I have a lot of people around me and supporting me, but when it comes to doing the work, I am by myself. Eventually it will grow to be bigger than just me, but right now, it is me and only me and I am feeling the isolation and loneliness. This isn’t a pity post, just the reality of being in a growing manufacturing business on your own.
Some words did resonate and hit me at the right time today (in a good way)…. I met with a company who set up my cleaning and sanitation procedures. The guy was pretty cool and walked me through everything. I texted him after and thanked him for his help today. His response was: “We got you.” I believe him and I know that I am working with people and companies who really mean what they say and are going to help me through this learning process. I also feel that way about my new building. The owner and his company have been wonderful; they are great people doing great things.
Again, all this good stuff happening, yet, I still feel alone. Weird right? No, totally normal when you are building something on your own. That’s it……